My name is Catherine, and I am a rehabilitating compulsive addicted gambler. Jan 29th, 2007 will be my 10-year mark in recuperation, but will never disremember where I have come from with gambling dependence.
Gambling addiction took away my life without killing me, it took away my family, friends, occupation, my house, and almost ruined my love life with my husband. It cost me more than what money can buy. Also, I wasn't aware I had psychological and psychiatric problems until some years later.
I came from the depths of hell, despondency, and hopelessness.
I arouse in an infirmary with bandages enfolded around both wrists and could listen two individuals speaking about knives all over the living room as I passed out once more. All I recall was everything returning to being dark in void. Now I understand that it was a complete mental and physical breakdown. A mental/emotional blackout. After that, I went to see a dependence/emotional crisis centre.
I was on suicide watch the initial few days. A rehab specialist supervised my situation. Not to forget I was a gambler without self discipline as well. For my gambling addiction, I got help from an addictions counsellor.
I tried quitting gambling without external help, but it was futile instead I had delved more into it; worse still, I even gambled when in rehab. I suppose I had not arrived underneath still.
Even after staying for 20 days in a crisis centre and self-murder attempt!
It's called ADDICTION. It is an illness that is so difficult to subdue. But can be done. My condition didn't end there.
Not because the compulsive gambling, I committed suicide again in 2006 for being unable to cope with the pressure of financial issues. It felt like I haven't completely recover my life including my financial condition.
First lesson? A well-adjusted recuperation program. Some years later, I envied those who had a normal healthy life, so I quit taking my prescriptions which served to treat my psychological problems. In this way, I quit taking them supposing it was recently the betting that was bringing on my dysfunctional behaviour issues of PTSD, hyper discouragement, mellow madness uneasiness and bipolar a sleeping disorder cycles and OCD. So, in a period of two weeks with no medications? I was back to intense depression and wanting to commit self-murder. My response? I consumed all my meds at ago. I had reached to that bad, black hole of gloom once again.
Back in the healing centre once more, an additional 16-day emergency focus stay and days of suicide watch.
When discharged this time, I had learned from my mistakes that I have to use drugs to manage my mental/emotional health and happiness as they refer to this as being "dually diagnosed or dual diagnosis."
Recuperation with even pessimistic encounters, dispersed with some "faith" can show us various life teachings in recuperation. We can't improve without imbibing many of the lessons we acquire in life. Notwithstanding when you are not taking part in your inclination of enslavement, we can at present have issues emerge and life challenges in recuperation, so being readied is imperative.
In the first place, the propensities and practices that we learn and get inside any dependence and "the cycle" of any habit should be hindered and taken away for us to have a shot at a genuine fair recuperation. Balance is the key in your recuperation way also. Taking in the aptitudes and instruments in treatment and treatment to break the cycle of enslavement and clear a way to dissipate control, foreswearing, reasons, and that's just the beginning.
Second, come to agree that recovery is a process which extends for the entire duration of life. It is as necessary to agree as Step one, complete surrender.
Next, is having a setup which halts the regression of the whole remedial process and it is essential for any individual who desires a permanent positive outcome. We all understand that life situations take place. These occurrences are not just catastrophic, but there are also joyful activities.
I feel it is the reason Gamblers Anonymous poses the question in our combo book of "The 20 Questions" to check whether you have an issue with betting. It is why they place #19.) "Did you ever have an encouragement to jubilee any great luck by some hours of gambling?" YES! For me, notwithstanding when things great happened, I would need to celebrate by going as far as anyone knows to have some "enjoyment" by betting. At that time, my addiction toward gambling was so serious, I tried everything to control myself with, other than Gamblers Anonymous.
I shared this gambling dependence with people that has common addicts to get support and to convince myself that this sickness is subtly dangerous and scheming. What's more, GA showed me that it is so imperative to be there for others through recuperation benefit as others were there for me when I was a newcomer.
We have to begin a discussion about this still quiet, quiet habit. There is a need to demolish the delusions and fabricated stories around addictions. This is the shortest and easiest path to eliminate the shame often associated with the addicted and those on the path to recovery. Truly, managing a psychological trauma while striving to attain a state of physical well-being is exacting; however outlining my travails, makes it clear that attaining a state of physical and mental well-being is feasible and every individual struggling with a rehab can have a life of laughter and happiness even during the rehabilitation period.